Meditation means different things to different people. Often, it can seem vague, pointless or even scary. Though, there is no need for it to be this way. Some people have tried it and thought “I can’t do this! It’s so boring” or perhaps “I’m awful at this! I can’t stop thinking!” (More on this later).
While there are many powerful forms of meditation that cut across time and cultural traditions, we can access this simple practice of self-care without the understanding of its various incarnations and directives of other types of meditations.
In other words, if you read or hear another way to meditate, don’t worry! You’re not doing it wrong.
It can also be a wonderful companion to psychotherapy. It has been used for thousands of years as a form of self-care, self-discipline, and for more esoteric reasons as well. Recently, many studies have shown the direct, positive impact of meditation on both mental and physical health issues.
Most meditations fall under one of three categories and all accept the present moment:
- Open Awareness
- Concentration of Attention with Mindful Acceptance.
- Compassion Cultivation
For the purposes of helping to facilitate our work together and your wellness, the following will be a guide that blends one form of Concentration of Attention with Open Awareness. Though it is quite possible that we do some work together regarding Compassion Cultivation at some point in session.Many meditative disciplines espouse specific postures to hold your body in. Though they can be beneficial, they are not fundamentally necessary to receive some of the benefits of meditation.
Goal: There is no goal of attainment to meditation. You live in constant meditation. Meditation is what you are, prior to the rise of mental and physical activity. If there were a goal, it would be for these activities to come to a natural rest. So, if you find yourself thinking and thinking, that’s okay! Everyone thinks. It doesn’t mean that you cannot meditate.
How Often to practice: 3 times per week, beginning with 10 minutes per day. Ideally, one would want to sit in meditation for 20-40 minutes and beyond, but for beginners, 10 minutes is fine. Everyone can find 10 minutes. If you can’t, wake up 10 minutes earlier 🙂
Instructions:(If you are new to meditation, only practice section 1 for now, and read the “Things to be Mindful of” at the bottom.
IMPORTANT: Acceptance of your experience is critical. This simply means that you recognize any thoughts/sensations/emotions as being already present and that they are an expression of yourself in this moment. All of them are only to be gently noticed with curiosity. Having curiosity about your experience is your doorway into accepting the experience as it is. Acceptance doesn’t mean that difficult things are okay and aren’t painful, it just means that you realize that it is how things are in this moment. Imagine watching clouds pass. They move slowly sometimes and at others, more quickly. Sometimes they are dark and sometimes white a fluffy. They take all shapes and forms, but they ALWAYS PASS. Your experiences during meditation are like the clouds. We don’t insist that clouds change and doing so wouldn’t help, it would only cause more angst when they don’t agree to change.
SECTION 1: Concentration of Attention with Mindful Acceptance:
- Find a comfortable,
preferably quiet place to sit.
- Set a timer
for the length of time that you choose to meditate.
- Close your eyes (If closing your eyes arouses anxiousness, contact me for information on keeping them open during meditation. This is actually recommended in some traditions)
- Begin by bringing your attention to the top of the head. Slowly begin to move your attention down through the body, noticing any place that may have tension. With each tense area, on your outbreath, imagine the air flowing into that part of the body. After a few breaths, continue the downward scan. Continue until you have reached the tips of your toes.
- Now, bring your attention to the first place that you notice feeling the air when you breath (Example: chest, throat, nose). Keep it there. You will notice that your attention wanders and becomes lost in thought. This is completely natural. Simply and gently return the focus of your attention to the breath each time that you recognize that it has wandered.
- Continue this approach for the duration of your time sitting. For some, this may be enough. For others, certain thoughts may become stuck, looping and aggressive. ***If you notice this to be the case, identify the emotion that it elicits and then “find it in the body”. Meaning, find how sensations of the physical body are expressing this thought and emotion (generally in the chest, but may be any part of the body). Instead of returning to the breath, focus your attention on the sensation of the body and keep it there until it subsides. Then, gently return your attention to the breath.
SECTION 2: Open Awareness:
Many people will find it helpful and even necessary to stay with the Concentration of Attention for quite some time. Moving from the Concentration of Attention in to a state of Open Awareness may take a while. At which time, one may begin with attention on the breath in the beginning and then relax into Open Awareness. You may think of Open Awareness as the complete relaxation of attention itself, though there are many other ways to conceptualize it. Over time, as you begin to notice this relaxation of attention, you will naturally move into an Open Awareness style of meditation. During Open Awareness, you become simply aware of the process of mental activity, though it too may subside. Your attention will not fixate upon any particular thought, emotion or physical sensation. However, moving directly into this style of meditation can be frustrating if the attention has not naturally relaxed. Still, it is what I am recommending that you try from time-to-time, once you become comfortable with the focusing the attention on the breath.
Things to be mindful of:
- Self-Judgement– “I am doing this wrong” or “I’m not good at this”. Remember, the entirety of your experience is transient and constantly changing. Your attention’s job is to contract on things such as thoughts, emotions and sensations. This is VERY natural. Just because your mind doesn’t become still and pristine after a few times of practice, you have not failed. Your intention is to simply “watch” what happening, no matter what it may be. Examples: back pain, thoughts about work etc.. Simply notice what you notice and move on.
- It’s Boring– This is an indication that you have a strong pattern of avoiding emotions by “doing” things. You are most likely using activities in your daily life to escape being present with your difficult emotions. The experience of being bored can be a powerful meditation tool. If you find yourself feeling bored, simply ask yourself, “can I continue for this moment?”. Boredom comes with the belief (like most beliefs), “It will be this way forever, or at least for a really long time.” You don’t have to sit in meditation forever, for an hour or even for 10 more seconds. You only have to sit there right now! If you ask yourself if you can sit there right now, the answer will always be YES! Because you are already doing it RIGHT NOW.
- Needing Results – Our culture has become so consumed with immediate satisfaction and comfort, that we often abandon things much too quickly. We want Amazon to delivery my next toy, Today! We want a magic pill that will solve our ailments. Because of this aspect of our culture, we have forsaken the legitimacy and the lasting transformation of practicing skills with patience. This is an invitation and an opportunity to regain an important facet of human experience and learning. Ultimately, bestowing the results that we so desperately try to attain with immediacy.
-Be Well-